In the last couple of weeks I have gotten so many questions from women I know about their vagina health. Questions about what to take, what to eat, how to fight infections, how to support their uterus, what to do about cysts, ulcerated uterus and the ultimate – reproductive cancer protection.
I can give all nutritional advice you want when it comes to healing with whole foods but if the soulful, energetic work is not done to heal your wounds, they may never truly heal.
I have been on my own vaginal/womb healing journey and I am now sharing this with you.
I have written this part of my story more times and more places than I can count, but always tucked it away after for a day when perhaps I would be brave enough to share it.
Today is that day.
I have a responsibility here and my work began 18 years ago although I have barely made headway until now. Sharing some of the deepest, hardest parts of our story is terrifying, but it is also so freeing.
I had my first real boyfriend when I was 15, who I believed I truly loved.
Our relationship was tumultuous to the extreme especially for any 15 year old to endure.
I share this story not as a victim, but as a warrior woman rising from the ashes of my past.
I kept something private for so long and in doing so I suppressed some of the most divine, beautiful parts of my soul.
I have held back my story, and my self due to feelings of shame, embarrassment, fear and also not wanting others pity.
I wanted to own my story but I didn’t own it at all, I buried it until it consumed me, not the events themselves but the disconnect I created in my mode of survival
I had no idea that what I thought I had released, was still holding me back in the biggest way.
Here is my story, how I chose to heal and how you can too.
I thought rape was something that only happened to other people. I thought that rape was something that happens to girl in dark alleys or parks late at night.
I had no idea that my boyfriend who forced me have sex with him repeatedly throughout our 2 year relationship was raping me.
Raping me of my right to say no, my security, my will power, my dignity and my divine feminine power.
I thought that because I said yes and gave up my virginity to him that meant that I always had to say yes, he obviously thought so too.
He was a tortured soul with many demons and I chose to love him in spite of that or perhaps because of it. That is what empaths do, try to save people before even saving themselves.
Physically I sustained whiplash from him shoving me as hard as possible from behind, bruises on my body from his anger outbursts & primal fear of losing my life from repeatedly hearing “I am going to kill you” while confining me in a car and speeding towards the lake we lived beside.
I was not “allowed” to wear tank tops, or shorts because I was his “property”.
I was not allowed to have other male friends or they too would feel his wrath and so in trying to protect myself and everyone I cared about I covered up my body, my spirit and I isolated myself.
Soulfully I suppressed my self confidence, my self worth, my beauty, my truth, my power and my connection to the deepest most beautiful part of me, my womb, my creation centre, my divine femininity.
I am sharing this now because everything in my life afterwards has stemmed from these events and my unconscious reluctance to release what happened, forgive myself, and heal.
I have faced the physical distress of infections including a touch of pre-cancerous cells on my cervix and the soul distress of being suppressed and suffocated by shame and fear.
I continued a perpetual cycle of abuse. Abuse of myself and abuse of others.
Abuse through alcohol, poor diet choices and very poor relationship choices
And so my purpose in revealing this story to you now is not only to feel the freedom in releasing it, but to also help you recognize and release yours.
Whatever has happened to you, has happened for you. It has happened to bring you to exactly where you are today. This truth is sometimes hard to believe in the thick of it all but I trust in the divine and I believe in the purpose of my creation.
It is time to release this part of your story and step into your divine feminine power.
It is time to heal your wounds and heal your womb.
What I know to be true when feminine power is suppressed, when we do not heal the psychological, spiritual and physical abuse then the cycle will continue.
Your vagina is your creation center. If it is imbalanced, unloved, abused, you as a whole will be out of balance.
The question now is not are you ready to heal, it is are you ready to stop being weighed down by the things that no longer serve your highest good?
I have seen the need and so I have responded.
This Monday April 25th I will be opening registration for my first group online vagina/womb healing course.
There is this stigma that as women we don’t talk about our vagina’s, we keep them private not only from the world, but from ourselves.
As women we have the biggest most bold, beautiful power, to create life inside of our bodies.
Our vagina’s and womb’s need the most love when it comes to self- care and self-awareness.
When there is a trauma, stress, infections, disease there becomes a disconnect from the one place you need to connect with the most in your body.
I have created this course for you if you:
Suffer from recurrent vaginal/pelvic infections/disease.
Have experienced some sort of trauma to your pelvic area whether it is physical, or emotional abuse or an accident.
You are having trouble connecting with your creation center, your feminine power.
You feel shame or embarrassment in regards to your vagina.
This course will teach you all about eating foods for your vagina’s health
Pelvic diseases/infections and what you can do to prevent and heal them naturally
Understanding the spiritual connection between your mind, body and your womb.
Root and Sacral Chakra balancing meditations.
Registration opens Monday, sign up here if you would like to be the first to be notified:
If any of this resonates with you and you would like to discuss further please feel free to contact me : info@janineaf.com
Thank you for reading
I look forward to connecting with you more <3
With Love & Light Always
Janine XO
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